My Virtual Reading Room

{TRANSLATION TO COME}--Cat 
ВОЛК И КУКУШКА

                "Прощай, соседка! - Волк Кукушке говорил, -
                Напрасно я себя покоем здесь манил!
                     Всё те ж у вас и люди и собаки:
                Один другого злей; и хоть ты ангел будь,
                        Так не минуешь с ними драки". -
                        "А далеко ль соседу путь?
                     И где такой народ благочестивой,
                     С которым думаешь ты жить в ладу?"
                        "О, я прямехонько иду
                        В леса Аркадии счастливой.
                        Соседка, то-то сторона!
                     Там, говорят, не знают, что война;
                        Как агнцы, кротки человеки
                        И молоком текут там реки;
                Ну, словом, царствуют златые времена!
                Как братья, все друг с другом поступают.
                И даже, говорят, собаки там не лают,
                        Не только не кусают.
                        Скажи ж сама, голубка, мне,
                        Не мило ль, даже и во сне,
                     Себя в краю таком увидеть тихом?
                        Прости! не поминай нас лихом!
                        Уж то-то там мы заживем:
                        В ладу, в довольстве, в неге!
                     Не так, как здесь, ходи с оглядкой днем
                        И не засни спокойно на ночлеге".
                     "Счастливый путь, сосед мой дорогой! -
                Кукушка говорит. - А свой ты нрав и зубы
                     Здесь кинешь, иль возьмешь с собой?"
                        "Уж кинуть, вздор какой!" -
                     "Так вспомни же меня, что быть тебе без шубы".


                        Чем нравом кто дурней,
                Тем более кричит и ропщет на людей:
                Не видит добрых он, куда ни обернется,
                     А первый сам ни с кем не уживется.

                1813

TWO AND ONE ARE A PROBLEM

Dear Miss Dix, I am a young man of half-past thirty-seven.
My friends say I am not unattractive, though to be kind and true is what I have always striven.
I am open-minded about beverages so long as they are grape, brandy or malt,
And I am generous to practically any fault.

Well Miss Dix not to beat around the bush, there is a certain someone who thinks I am pretty nice,
And I turn to you for advice.
You see, it started when I was away on the road
And returned to find a pair of lovebirds had taken up their residence in my abode.

Well I am not crazy about lovebirds, but I must say they looked very sweet in their gilded cage,
And their friendship had reached an advanced stage,
And I had just forgiven her who of the feathered fiances was the donor of
When the children caught a lost lovebird in the yard that we couldn't locate the owner of.

So then we had three, and it was no time for flippancy,
Because everybody knows that a lovebird without its own lovebird to love will pine away and die of the discrepancy,
So we bought a fourth lovebird for the third lovebird and they sat around very cozily beak to beak
And then the third lovebird that we had provided the fourth lovebird for to keep it from dying died at the end of the week,

So we were left with an odd lovebird and it was no time for flippancy,
Because a lovebird without its own lovebird to love will pine away and die of the discrepancy,
So we had to buy a fifth lovebird to console the fourth lovebird that we had bought to keep the third lovebird contented,
And now the fourth lovebird has lost its appetite, and Miss Dix, I am going demented.

I don't want to break any hearts, but I got to know where I'm at;
Must I keep on buying lovebirds, Miss Dix, or do you think it would be all right to buy a cat?

(Ogden Nash)

President Obama signed a proclamation declaring the H1N1 influenza a national emergency, giving doctors and medical facilities greater leeway in responding to the flu pandemic.

Obama signed the declaration late Friday, which the White House said allows medical treatment facilities to better handle a surge in flu patients by waiving federal requirements on a case-by-case basis.

"The foundation of our national approach to the H1N1 flu has been preparedness at all levels -- personal, business, and government -- and this proclamation helps that effort by advancing our overall response capability," the White House said in a statement.

The flu has infected millions of Americans and killed nearly 100 children in the U.S. The chief of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said Friday that over a thousand people have died as a result, with 46 states reporting widespread H1N1 activity.

"Since the beginning of the pandemic, we've seen more than 1,000 deaths and 20,000 hospitalizations," said Dr. Thomas Frieden, head of the CDC. "We expect it to occur in waves, but we can't predict when those waves will happen."

Sixty million Americans have been vaccinated against the seasonal flu this year, but an additional vaccine against H1N1 has been in short supply. About 120 million doses were expected to be made available by the middle of October, though only 11 million doses have been shipped to health departments for use.